I did it.

Yep. After years of planning, and talking it over with my husband (who didn't want it to happen, but agrees it 'isn't too bad'), I took the plunge. I love it. What do you think?

Is that the SUN I see?

It feels fabulous to see the sunshine! I am so excited. Mikaela and I are breaking out the sidewalk chalk in a few minutes, as soon as we finish cleaning up around the house. YAY for spring, even if it is a *month* late!

AND, even more exciting in the land of Tiffany...I broke out the summer clothes. For Mikaela, this means shorts and tshirts and flip flops. I swore off shorts long ago, however, and for me it just means capris and flops of many colors. I was so excited to try on a pair of pants, that I couldn't even *button* last fall, and now they're a little LOOSE! YAY for losing 14 pounds!

Happy Easter!

So. I forgot the camera when we went to my grandmother's (or Big Granny, to all the greats) and got NO pictures of Mikaela and all her cousins there. What Mikaela did get, however, was a crapton of candy and a splinter. Yep. First one ever. My cousin was able to remove it after many minutes of splinter surgery, though, and I am pleased to report that Mikaela's big toe will suffer no lasting harmful effects!

I *did* remember the camera when we went to Aunt KK's, but of course, Mikaela promptly spilled ketchup down her dress and went hunting for eggs dressed in what was a sundress two Easter's ago, but now is shirt length and a skirt from last summer. We do have some pretty funny pictures of that, though.
So, all in all we had a great day. Have I mentioned that Mikaela doesn't like the Easter bunny? We just don't even talk about him, after last year when she was SO insistent that she didn't want the Easter bunny in her house and that her Easter basket and treats were from Mommy and Daddy, thankyouverymuch.

So. Back to work tomorrow. Have a great week!

Randomosity.

I love LOVE my new job. I'm not fully coded yet though, which means there's still stuff I'm not able to do (like teller). But, opening accounts is cool.

I miss my kid. I haven't seen her much this week and I'm stressing out over it. But, I am OFF on Sunday, which means we can snuggle in together for the whole Easter thing and have a ball! We're going to do plastic eggs for any hunts, but of course we're going to dye some for eating, as well. I promised her we'd put some buttercups in the dye and see if they changed color.

I've lost 8 pounds! yay me!

Kids aren't oblivious.

I've noticed a definite change in Mikaela's behavior lately. Prior to two weeks ago, we were noticing marked improvement in the 'troublesome three' arena. Less whiney-bum, more self-sufficient big kid. She kept her ears turned on more than 50% of the day and was reasonable.

However, since we've had our schedules screwed up because of Sam's dad's illness, she's backpedalled. She's once again quick tempered, whiny, needy and unreasonable.
I feel bad for her. Because, really, we've been so focused on Sam's dad, how he's feeling (and how everyone else is handling it), that we've totally missed the fact that she's old enough now to *understand* things.
No three year old should have to wonder if the grandparent being carried to an ambulance is going to join 'Gramma in Heaven.'
I feel terrible that she witnessed it, and even more badly that we've neglected to try to explain things to her.

Workin' mama.

Oh, how lovely. And how terrifyingly sad.

I have a *gulp* J.O.B.
I thought this day would never come. I thought I'd simply exist as Mommy, forever and ever and ever...but, just as I was finally sinking into that, getting a groove going with the whole SAHM thing...I get a REAL JOB!

Too bad it's not teaching. THAT would've really spun me round.

How do you want to die?

What a harsh, harsh question. Nobody likes to think of their own mortality. Everyone talks a lot about what they want to accomplish while they're living, and what's waiting for them after they're gone. No one wants to ponder the transition between the two.

However, recent events have started a strange train of thought in my head. I've realized how important--and how kind-- it is to think of these things WAY before any decisions must be made in the heat of the moment.

There are no cut-and-dry answers here. It all comes down to your wishes. Don't just leave it to chance that your loved ones would make the same decisions you would, should they ever have to choose for you.

Talk to them, often. Make them clear about what your wishes are about things like ventilators, artificial nutrition, when (and when NOT) to resuscitate. This is your life, and they're your decisions to make. Please make them, and make them legal.

No child wants to be left with the reality that they made the 'dying decision' in a parent's life. It's not fair to anyone.